Time for a very honest post, life with 2 children is hard work. I feel so incredibly blessed to have my 2 little darlings, but wow...this isn't easy! I've recently become very overwhelmed by it all. There are days when Ivy is constantly crying and Ethan is having tantrum after tantrum and I just don't know how to cope. Speaking to friends who also have two young children, I've found that this is quite common, this feeling of not knowing who to help first. The feeling that you just can't be two places at once and to help one child means to neglect the other, it just all gets to be a bit much.
Ivy is needy, she's a tiny baby, so that's just a fact, she needs me and I need to be there for her. I wouldn't say that we perfectly practice attachment parenting, but with Ethan we did our best to always respond to his needs as quickly as possible, which is much more difficult this time around. Then there's Ethan, he is a lovely and sweet little boy, but like any other 2 1/2 year old he has his tantrums. He doesn't have any patience, he doesn't understand having to wait and he just wants me to play with him. I am so lucky that they absolutely adore each other and love being in each other's company. Ethan doesn't blame Ivy for having less time with me, he wants her there playing with us as well. But for me it just gets a bit much when he's climbing all over her (and me) when I'm trying to feed her and change her.
It's time to put a plan into action, after a particularly difficult morning I strapped them both into the double buggy and went for a long walk to clear my head (something I would highly recommend on days like that). I decided two things:
- I need to find ways to keep Ethan busy during the times that I simply can't play with him (when feeding and changing Ivy)
- I need to find ways to manage Ethan's behaviour (even though I know that these tantrums are normal, I don't want them to get out of hand)
- books (simple ones that he's very familiar with and can look at on his own)
- colouring book and crayons
- sticker book
- 2 Hot Wheels cars
- a WOW toy, including people and animals that go inside
- a small set of building blocks or Lego Duplo blocks
So far I can't say for sure if these methods are working, but I certainly feel better and more in control now that I've tried to do something. Ethan does love his busy boxes and happily plays with them on his own, but doesn't always go to them when I ask him to. We've only just tried the thinking mat a couple of times, but hopefully it will start to work and we can have a slightly calmer house...at least some of the time!
1 comments
It really sounds like you have come up with some great ideas to handle these challenging times. It is not easy raising children, especially when there is more than one and so close in age. However, speaking from experience and I'm sure you know this already, it's all worth it and you will have 2 amazing children because of your persistence and love.
ReplyDelete